That Time I Was Almost A Video Ho

Paul did a music video for the single “Fast Lane” off his upcoming album. He wanted to do a spoof of bad 90’s horror films. We have spent many a Saturday afternoon watching bad sci-fi and horror movies. If you haven’t yet watched Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus or Mega Python vs. Gatoroid starring eighties singers, Tiffany and Debbie Gibson, I highly recommend. They are two of our favorites. Disclaimer: they are best watched not entirely sober.

Anyway, his manager, Suz, found this corn maze and farm in NJ where it would be set. He wanted to make it cheesy and fun, so he cast the stereotypical high school roles: cheerleader, football star, token black guy, stoner, and slutty chick. ANGI3 and BS, the featured rappers on this song, were the cheerleader and football star. He had some friends play the stoner and token black guy. But he was having trouble finding a girl who was available for the day to be the slutty chick.

After many slightly awkward phone calls asking girls he knew if they would be his slutty chick, I finally stepped in and offered to do it. I knew he wouldn't ask me, because he knows I hate to be on camera (I have total stage fright). But that’s what a good wife does. She offers to be her husband’s ho in his rap video, right?

Seeing as I am a classy girl, we went to Salvation Army to acquire a wardrobe for my role. We found some leopard print, velvet, studded, 5 inch heels that were god-awful but perfect and a leather jacket. Luckily for me, Suz stepped in at the last minute and volunteered to do it. I cannot thank her enough. She did a much better job than I ever could have.