Monday, February 24, 2014

On Becoming Mrs. Green

So I didn’t change my name when Paul and I got married. It was never something I planned on doing. My mom never changed her name, so I grew up assuming I would keep mine too. Plus I’ve been working and building my professional network in New York City for almost eight years, and changing my name now seemed counterintuitive. Not to mention the paperwork nightmare that seems to be involved with changing your name. Willfully going to the DMV? No thanks.

me at work
But I was surprised by the reactions of some of our friends and family. Some thought it might be confusing for our future children. I can honestly say it never confused me that my parents didn’t share a last name. I knew my parents were married and that they loved each other and that was that. My dad didn’t wear his wedding band (he’s not a jewelry wearing type of man) and that didn’t confuse me either! It was also suggested that it would appear like I didn’t respect my man or that Paul’s masculinity would be challenged. Please. Paul’s ego is just fine. Especially concerning my love and respect. And it's not like I get upset if I'm called Mrs. Womack or anything. It just probably means you don’t know me that well.

Paul at work
I am, however, loving being Mrs. Green. Since a lot of people in the rap scene only know Paul as Willie Green, I’m ‘Green’s wife’ by default. Just last week, Paul and I were out with Corina Corina celebrating the completion of her second album. She got a phone call from a fellow musician and when asked who she was out with, she answered “the Greens”. I thought it was great. I'm good with being Mrs. Green.

People often jokingly ask me what my rap name would be, and I never have an answer for them. That’s Paul’s world, and I don’t pretend like I actually belong there on my own. I’m able to ride off Paul’s street cred as his wife, but let’s be real, Paul translates slang for me all the time.

But it’s more than street cred by osmosis. We both have our own identities, especially within our professional spheres. Paul’s happens to be a rap world- one where he’s spent years building his reputation and where he's earned his respect. And I’m proud of being Mrs. Green. When he’s in my world, he better be damn proud to be Mr. Merrill.